Listening is risky because…

Please write your finish to this sentence: Listening is risky because… Then, please reply and send what you wrote to me. Next time, I’ll post the answer I came across last week that shocked me. Best...
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Independence Day Parade

Independence! What a parade! Conceived in secret, resulting in dependency—no choices and infinite chances. Coming out—crying our first “barbaric yawp over the roofs of the world.” Cheering the child toward codependency—use only a No. 2 pencil; fill-in the bubble. Clamoring out with clear-confusing teenage independence—shouting (or scoring on the SAT) a second ...
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Your conversations. Do they help or hurt?

In her 2014 book, Conversational Intelligence, Judith E. Glaser quotes her own writing from 30 plus years ago: “To get to the next level of greatness depends on the quality of our culture, which depends on the quality of our relationships, which depends on the quality of our conversations. Everything happens through conversations.” Now, focusing on Conversational Intelligence within...
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Leaders Listen Baseball Style

Listening is like baseball. It works best with foul lines and a chance to hit the ball inside those lines. A good listener marks out the chalk lines and pitches to the talker so they can hit the ball within the lines. So, it’s okay to find out the topic. It’s okay to set a time limit. It’s okay to ask questions that will help the talker make a hit. It’s not as okay to...
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Great questions for listening

Michael Bungay Stanier, in his great book, The Coaching Habit, gives us seven coaching questions that help with listening. They are: The Kickstart Question — What’s on your mind?  The AWE Question — And what else? The Focus Question — What’s the real challenge here? The Foundation Question — What do you want? The Lazy Question — How can I...
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Failure! The Key to Success!

Failure! The Key to Success. So, sit in the front seat of the roller coaster and go for it! “Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” — Winston Churchill “80% of success is just showing up.” — Woody Allen “Go on failing. Go on. Only next time try to fail better.” – Samuel Beckett “The outward person perishes, but the inward person is renewed...
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Keep Calm and Recap

“Yes, that’s it,” and  “Exactly,” and “You got it,” are the responses you hear when you slow down to summarize what someone is sharing with you. Then you may hear their highlight, “I’m happy that you accurately repeated back a brief summary of each main item I shared. It lets me know you’re listening.” Sharing what you heard and...
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“Onward Through the Fog!”—R. Crumb

Perfection fosters procrastination.  We dream. Then, as we think about putting feet-t0-our-dreams, the dark cloud of perfection reminds us that there is no use in even starting since it won’t be perfect anyway. And starting is exactly how to begin! Step right into that gloomy fog of procrastination. Start with a tiny step that takes 60 seconds or less. Then see what happens. My tiny step...
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They wonder about you.

People are wondering about you. They wonder: Are you for me (or not)? Can you help me prepare and make progress (or not)? Do you think you are more important than me (or not)? Do I get a say (or not)?   If you can demonstrate that: You are for them You want to help them prosper You show yourself to be humble and supportive, and that, You truly want to hear what they have to say They...
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Get your Charisma ARGHing–in just FIVE minutes or less!

Get your leadership charisma ARGHing–in FIVE minutes or less. Click here to enjoy my Relational Intelligence for Leaders blockbuster! Then email me at  coachingparker@comcast.net  and let me know at what point your charisma kicked in!   P.S. Once the link opens, wait a few seconds and it will start on its own. Be sure your sound is...
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Listening is Tough

Listening is tough, especially when we are under fire. Here’s one reason why we struggle First, Appreciate your brilliance. Our brilliant brains think at the rate of 1,000 to 1,400 words per minute. People speak at about 125 to 140 words per minute. That affords us a lot of downtimes—time to get distracted, begin our defense, come up with solutions, daydream, and, eventually,...
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Who’s building the building?

Am I building something, or am I contributing to something that’s being built? That’s a good question. If I perceive myself as building something then my ownership and control issues will be stronger.  I may feel, or wish to feel, more powerful. I may also feel more, or less, stressed, dependent on how things seem to be going. If I perceive myself as contributing to something bigger...
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